10 Things in 2 Weeks
- Remember What Your First Time Felt Like // there is a lot about life on the field that has just become “common sense” to me since this isn’t my first go-around. From travel days, to weekly schedules and other common “World Race Ways,” I have had to intentionally slow down, and remember what it was like the first time I traveled overseas with a group of 44…the first time I had to get to ministry in a foreign country via public transportation with very little ability to speak the local language…the first time I had to sit in community with strangers and choose to let them into my vulnerable process…because while those things feel easy to me now, they’re new and scary for the ones I am leading- and they aren’t looking for someone up ahead to “keep up with”….they want someone next to them- showing them, teaching them, and doing it with them. Its honestly a really beautiful picture of what discipleship practically looks like; Jesus always showed His disciples what He was doing, and He did it with them before He left. I always want the men and women I disciple to know that I am in it with them, and that they aren’t learning alone. Slowing down and remembering what it felt like to be in their shoes in moments where its easy for me to operate on auto-pilot helps me connect back to the excitement of a new adventure, and experience the wonder with them.
- Public Transportation is (still) Hard // When I was on my Race, public transportation was something that always stressed me out, mainly because of the massive language barrier that demanded some pretty deep trust in a total stranger to take get you to the right place. Now, though I’m familiar with it and can do it, its still not my favorite thing. I also already miss the freedom of hopping in my little beetle and driving myself wherever I need or want to go.
- Leaders are Learners // I have said “I don’t know” more in the last 2 weeks than I feel like I have in my life…and now, I firmly believe now that if I think I know everything, I really know nothing. A few weeks ago, at launch, one of our racers approached me with a question on a topic that I honestly knew nothing about. But my co-leader Aly is passionately informed on the subject. It was relieving to be able to confidently direct our racer to Aly, rather than try to satisfy my own ego by trying to teach something I didn’t have a ton of wisdom in. Along with that, Aly got to give me her wisdom and experience so that I was better prepared for next time. Being a leader does not mean you know everything- it actually means you never stop learning. I have been learning through asking for help, through flat out failure, through intentional seeking in the Word, and so much more. It has taken humility to admit that I’m not “all that.” And I don’t wanna be- I love my team and I love the support I get from living in community.
- Ear Plugs and Eye Masks are LIFE // 44 humans, one house. I think this one speaks for itself.
- Even an Extrovert Needs to Introvert // Listen. I love people. I LOVE making people laugh, I love quality, one-on-one conversations, I love the spontaneous groups that form when people walking by decide they want to sit and hang, I love being the goofiest, loudest one in the room to get the atmosphere alive…I am (almost) always down to be interrupted for the sake of community. And yet- there are times when I have noticed that if I want to have the capacity to give my full self to those moments, I NEED to be alone- in stillness and silence- being refreshed by my Father. I’ve wanted to connect with every single person on my squad and snag each possible moment here in what feels like the “foundational beginning” so that my people know I am available to them. Yet I’ve been learning how to really listen to myself, and my needs, and recognize when I’m going to drain myself dry if I don’t sneak away to be with Him. And that is true availability.
- Seltzer Water Can Fix (almost) Anything // Listen. Coming home after a long day to a teammate surprising you with your favorite drink is almost as good as the drink itself. As I sit here writing this, I have 3 bottles of seltzer water sitting next to me from my girl Kyla who picked them up from the store for me. Have I mentioned how much I love these people and the little ways they show me their big love?
- People Will Follow the Fearless // A small example with a huge lesson: I use to hate working out in front of people. I was so self-conscious and insecure, and I never wanted people to see me struggle through 10 burpees or 12 bicep curls. Its been about a year months since I chose to fight for myself, my health, and my worth. Now, I love working out with people- in fact, its hard to get motivated if I don’t have a buddy. Last week I was going to go work out in the yard, and by the time I got ready to start, there were about 10 girls with me who all asked if they could join. Several of them pulled me aside after and said “I feel more confident when I work out with you.” THAT’S INSANE Y’ALL. Not even a year ago I couldn’t look at myself in a gym mirror without being embarrassed- and last week I basically led 10 girls in a work out class who didn’t feel confident enough to do it on their own. People are always watching to see who is going to show them that something CAN be done. I’m so convinced that having the courage to be the first one to do something scary and vulnerable is often the most empowering invitation for the people around you to start walking it out for themselves.
- Its OK To Ask For What You Need // I’m convinced I’m not the only one who LOVES when someone just knows how to love and support and care for you without you having to say a word. It is the best feeling. But the reality is that not everyone in your community is going to “just know.” And that doesn’t mean they don’t care! It simply means they just don’t know. It’s unfair for us to expect that kind of knowledge from someone else. It is my job to tell the people in my community “hey, this is how I need you to love and support me…I know you need it in different ways- lets both be intentional.” It feels vulnerable, and I think thats the point when it comes to building healthy community…friendships built on vulnerable trust, respect, and honor for one another can form the most unlikely, life-long brotherhoods.
- Dear God, Thank You For Creating the Human Who Invented the Aeropress // I love my coffee, and I just have to say that I have never been more glad to have packed a “luxury item” as much as I am about my aeropress. Coffee all DAY. Until 2 pm. Then its decaf all day.
- We’ve Got It Good // The people here are unbelievably hard working. From walking almost everywhere, to eating everything but the bones of a chicken, to mixing concrete by hand with shovels and wheelbarrows- they value and respect everything they have because they worked hard for it. And rather than complaining, they are deeply grateful and generous. Joining in on their life and culture has been an honor.
